The Heart of Destiny
by the whisperor
Summary: Tenel Ka has always been a warrior of Dathomir rather then a Hapen princess, but when her mother dies and she becomes the Queen of Hapes, Tenel Ka learns just how unprepared she really is for the corrupt world of politics and power. Set four years after
1. The hair clip

Tenel Ka, princess of Hapes, lay face up in her bed with the covers clenched to her chin. Her eyes focused on the ceiling of her room, covered in holographically-projected stars and moons, but her ears were keenly pricked, catching every nuance of the heated argument that was going on outside her room.  
"You'll make her into a spoiled weakling. Is that what you want?" The sound of her mother's voice pierced through the air with a shrillness that would have made Tenel Ka wince if she had allowed herself the luxury of physical movement.   
"It was a gift, Tenenial. A gift I wanted her to have. One small gift from a father to a daughter, how could that turn her into a spoiled weakling?" Her father's deep voice, usually so calm and soothing, was taught with anger.   
"A frivolous trinket. That is all it was. And what use has she for trinkets. She is a warrior."  
"She is a child!" Isolder responded emphatically. "And it was not a frivolous trinket. It was a hand-crafted heirloom that his been in my family for over six generations. You had no right to take it away from her."  
"And you had no right to give it to her without telling me." Tenenial Djo's voice had grown even shriller, and Tenel Ka no longer had to strain to make out her words.   
"I didn't tell you because I knew you would disapprove." Isolder responded.  
"Of course I disapprove. She has no use for such a thing. She is my daughter, and therefore a warrior of Dathomir, and she shall be raised according to the traditions of the witches of Dathomir."  
"And what of my traditions?" Isolder yelled back at her, no longer making any effort to conceal his anger. "She may be a warrior of Dathomir, but she is also a princess of Hapes. And she is my daughter as well as yours, Tenenial. Am I not to have a say in the way she is raised?"   
"You may be her father, Isolder, but you are still only a man. You have no right to tell me how to raise her. I say she has no use for that trinket, and that is final. You do not contradict me, or go behind my back again." Tenel Ka could hear the sound of movement, and then a door slammed on the other side of the wall.   
For a while she simply lay there, motionless, staring up at the pseudo stars. Her toe began to itch, but she made no move to relieve the annoyance. Her eyes began to water, but whether from tears or because she hadn't blinked in over a minute, even she did not know. Her mind was mysteriously blank, her emotions contained.   
She was an unusual child, even for a princess. Precocious certainly, and intelligent as well, but she had a tendency to hide her feelings and didn't talk much. She never laughed; she never cried. Many of the courtiers that lived in the palace avoided her, unnerved by her silent gray star and her stiff manner. Even at the age of six, there was an air of tragedy about her; a tension that seemed to suggest the cool exterior hid a troubled soul. Her tutors and maids would often talk about her to one another, when none of the royal family was near by. Still waters run deep, they would say.   
After about twenty minutes, Tenel Ka's heightened sense of hearing picked up the small creak of a door opening, and her eyes shifted to the small ray of light that filtered in through the gap made as the door swung open. She heard footsteps near the edge of her bed, and she knew it was her father. Cautiously, she moved the covers away from her face and tilted her head towards her chest to look at him. He smiled at her, the special, reassuring smile he only used when they were alone, and held out his arms. Quick as lightning, she jumped into them, and he sat down on the bed, holding her in his lap. Tenel Ka was a big girl for her age, but her father's large arms easily encompassed her and swallowed her in an embrace of comfort. She leaned her head on his shoulder, her long red hair tumbling over his chest and into her face.   
"How goes it with you, Tenella?" He asked quietly, using his special, private nick name for her, which he only used when her mother wasn't around. Tenenial had always told Tenel Ka that she should be proud of her name. It was a good Dathomiran name, one that befit a great warrior. But Tenel Ka loved her father's nickname for her nonetheless. She loved the way it rolled of his tongue as he held her. It made her feel safe, and loved.  
She looked up at him, into his warm gray eyes. Quietly, and a bit sheepishly, she removed her hand from her night gown and held up a mother of pearl hair clip, intricately crafted so that the swirls seemed to be moving in her hand.   
"I took it from the garbage after mother went away." She said softly, in her steady girlish voice. "Was it wrong, father?" she asked, still looking up at him.   
"What does your heart tell you?" he asked smiling down at her. She looked down at the clip and then back up at him.   
"It tells me that I want the hair clip." She said, cocking her head to one side.   
"Then it was not wrong." He answered, drawing her close to him. "My child." He said, almost sadly as he held her. "You are caught between two worlds."  
"What is to become of me, father?" she asked, her face pressed against his chest.   
"Your mother wants you to become a warrior of Dathomir." Isolder said, quietly. "You grandmother wants you to be a perfect princess."  
"And what do you want me to be?" Tenel Ka asked, pulling away so she could look up at him.  
"I want you to be happy." He said. "you are strong, Tenella. I know you will not let yourself be pushed into place. By anyone, even your mother."   
"But what should I do?" she asked.  
"You must do as your heart tells you." He answered. "Always."  



	2. The Queen Is Dead

Chapter 2: The Queen is Dead

Chapter 2: The Queen is Dead. 

Sunset in the palace of Hapes was always a spectacular affair. The last streaks of daylight reflected off of the many fountains in the palace gardens, and the colored clouds lent an almost ethereal quality to the lavish and luxurious edifices. Servants, courtiers, and even members of the royal family often gathered in the gardens to watch the sunset. They used the time as a small breather, a break from their daily schedules, when they could simply stand amid the luscious greenery with no thought on their minds other then the beauty of the clouds and sea.

Jamar Amdal stood among the groups of people, his eyes downcast and his hands clasped behind his back. No one paid any attention to him; they were all far too busy enjoying the sunset to notice one simple male servant, which was precisely the reason Amdal had chosen this particular time to infiltrate the palace. Quietly, he moved between the onlookers until he reached the palace door, and slipped silently inside. No one took any more interest in his departure then they had in his entry. And the sun slowly sank beneath the horizon.

Once inside, he continued to move unnoticed though the halls and corridors of the palace. As an infiltration unit he couldn't have been more perfect: he was handsome as all people on Hapes were handsome, but not in a way that drew attention to himself. He was of medium height, medium build, had brown hair and eyes and no physical attribute that in any way adhered him to memory. His face, while pleasant, was one that was easily and quickly forgotten wherever he went. No one looking at him would guess he was an assassin, and one of the best at that. Which was, of course, precisely what made him such a good assassin in the first place. 

Walking quickly, navigating the halls with a practiced ease that to all appearances spoke of long years as a palace servant but in reality was as a result of careful study of the palace blueprints, he soon reached the wing reserved for the royal family. It was not the largest in the palace, but is was the most elaborately decorated and ornately furnished. Silent as a mouse, he ducked behind a corner and removed from his pocket a small mechanical device, which he cupped in the palm of his hand. Stepping out from the discreet alcove, he once again moved along the corridors until he reached the entrance to the Queen's quarters. 

The rooms of the queen were heavily guarded at all times, but at present there were only two guards standing outside of the door. Usually there were four, but the other two had become mysteriously ill only a few minutes before, and had been rushed to the small medical center on the other side of the palace. There had not yet been time to replace them, but the guards were not nervous. After all, the Queen was well known for her skills as a warrior, and as a force user as well. What assassin would be foolish enough to challenge her?

As he approached the doorway and the guards, Amdal swiftly thumbed the device hidden in his hand, and the security cameras outside the Queen's quarters went dead. But before the guards had time to notice, Amdal had come before them.

"The Queen has sent for me." He said calmly to them. The guards looked at each other. 

"Her majesty desires refreshment of some kind?" One of them asked, looking dubiously at Amdal's seemingly empty hands. 

"Of some kind." Amdal replied, the corner of his mouth turning up in a lascivious smile. The guards frowned. Unlike many of the courtiers in the palace, the queen was not known for seeking pleasure outside of the marriage bed. Prince Isolder was, after all, an extremely handsome man. Much handsomer then this young man, although he was not bad looking. However, they knew better then to contradict the Queen, who _was_ known for her temper. Still looking dubious, the guards stepped aside and allowed Amdal access to the room. From a corner of the mechanical device in his palm, Amdal dislodged a small spherical ball and allowed it to drop silently onto the floor between the two guards. Then he opened the door, and stepped into the room.

The door closed behind him. Inside, he found the room to be much more sparse and severe then he had expected. He had been inside the private chambers of many female courtiers and had found them all to be ornate and cluttered, but this looked more like the room of a warrior. He smiled slightly, his respect for the Queen growing just a bit. 

He walked through the anti-chamber and the various side rooms, his soft shoes making no noise on the floor. He dropped his right hand, the hand not carrying the mechanical device, and allowed the smooth blade nestled in the folds of his inner sleeve to fall into his hand. Finally, he reached the last room in the Queen's quarters: the bedroom. The door was ajar, and he could see her, sitting at her desk writing. Quietly he crept through the door and up behind her, careful not to make a sound. But when he was less then two feet away the floorboard under him gave a small creak, and she turned around. Before she could do anything other then gape at him, he backhanded her across the face, sending her crashing to the floor. 

In less then a second she was up again, grasping around her for some weapon to use against him. He grinned and came towards her with his thin bladed knife held before him. 

"How" she gasped, staring wide-eyed at him, "how… I can't…" 

"Your force skills can't help you, your majesty." He spat at her, still grinning. With his other hand, he pulled back his right sleeve to reveal a thin armband composed of some scaly material she could not recognize. It looked a little like the scaly armor worn by the warriors of Dathomir…

"Ysalamiri." He said, cruelly. It took her a moment to realize the implications of this, but then her eyes grew cold and she swallowed dryly. While still a great warrior, she was no longer young, and her opponent was a man in his prime. But if she was to die, she would do so fighting, as befitted a warrior of Dathomir. She flew at him, her fingers spread like claws and her eyes spitting fire. But he was ready for her, and swung the blade to cut a thin gash across her shoulders, and then grasped her neck with his free hand. She began to choke, clawing at his hand with her nails but to no avail. He simply stared down at her for over a minute as her eyes began to glaze and a trickle of blood dripped down from her nose. Then he released her, and she fell across the bed, gasping for air. 

"Oh no, your majesty." He said, breathing hard, his brown eyes as cold as ice. "It will not be so easy for you. You will not die so quickly. First you will suffer, as we men have suffered under the Queen Mothers ever since the lorall raiders left centuries ago. First you will feel what it means to be oppressed." With that, he stepped toward her and leaning down, pressed the tip of the knife between her breasts. Feebly she tried to role away, and then screamed as the knife ripped from her chest to her navel, cutting through skin and cloth. 

Some time later, his mission completely, Jamar Amdal stepped through the doorway to the Queen's quarters, taking a minute to look down contemptuously at the fallen guards, dead from the poisonous gas released by the small ball he had dropped. In his hand he held the mechanical device, recovered from where he had dropped it in his fight with the Queen. He looked up at the dead security cameras, laughed slightly, and proceeded down the corridor to the exit. No one noticed the sweat on his brow, or the tears in his shirt where the Queen had tried to fight him off. He reached the exit with as little difficulty as he had entered it, and walked out into the cool evening air. Over in the garden, the last rays of sunlight could be seen shimmering beneath the sea. 


	3. Long Live The Queen

Chapter 3: Long Live the Queen

Chapter 3: Long Live the Queen

Tenel Ka Chume Ta Djo, warrior of Dathomir and Jedi Knight of the former New Republic, sat in a plush chair in the medium sized receiving room of her quarters in the palace of Hapes. She looked extremely out of place: her tall, slender yet muscular frame was clothed only in lizard hide armor, and her red-gold hair was caught up in numerous braids decorated with beads and feathers. 

She was quite attractive in an amazonian kind of way. Her hair was thick and bright, even in the wild braids, and her smooth skinned face was well shaped. Her large gray eyes, cold and emotionless, were nonetheless intriguing in their own way, and the curves of her body were visible even through the shapeless armor. It was in spite of, rather then as a result of her apparel and hairstyle that she still seemed beautiful. Some women will look lovely under any circumstances and in any clothes, and Tenel Ka was one of them. People around her had often wondered what she would look like if dressed in a less barbaric fashion, but not even her most intimate friends had seen her in such a condition since her brief stay on Hapes when she first lost her arm. But she had grown from a girl to a woman since then, and looked very different then she had at fourteen. 

Several attendants and guards and courtiers stood in the room around her, glancing nervously at each other, wondering when the princess was going to move. But she showed no sign of losing interest in the design of the walls, and simply sat there, ignoring the fidgeting of the men and women around her. Finally, after over half an hour, she lifted her head and shifted her stiff gray gaze to Aliona Phazir, the captain of the guard. Aliona, a tall, striking woman with black hair, blue eyes and a prominent scar running from her right temple to her jawbone returned Tenel Ka's gaze without flinching. She, unlike the rest of the people in the room, was not intimidated by the fact that the princess was a "spoon bending sorceress."

"My mother is dead, Captain." She said in a cold, emotionless voice. "How." The Captain stood at attention. 

"The palace was infiltrated, your majesty." She said, in a voice just as cold and emotionless as Tenel Ka's. "The assassin poisoned the guards outside your mother's room, two by putting poisonous powder in their food, and the other two by poison gas. Then he went into her room, and killed her using a sharp object we believe to be a knife." Tenel Ka's face did not twitch.

"You say he, Captain." She said. "How do you know it was a male?" 

"Because the body had been raped when we found it, your majesty." Aliona responded, her voice even harder then before. For the first time since she had entered the room, Tenel Ka's face showed some emotion. He eyes softened, and a look of horror and sadness escaped from her features, but was quickly suppressed.

"How?" she said again, still looking at Aliona. "How does an assassin, any assassin, infiltrate the palace so easily? Why weren't better precautions taken? Why wasn't the Queen more heavily guarded?" 

"The Queen chose to rely mostly on her own skills for protection, your highness." Aliona responded. Tenel Ka stared at her for a moment, then shifted her gaze once again to contemplate the floor. Then she looked up. 

"Where is my father?" she asked, her voice somewhat less cold then it had been. 

"He has been notified of your arrival, as has the rest of your family. They are on their way." 

"but where is he?" 

"With your mother's body, your highness." Tenel Ka nodded. As befitted a good husband, he would stand vigil with his wife's body for forty-eight hours, without food or water. When his vigil was over, the body would be cremated and the remains placed in the crypts beneath the palace along with all of the other dead Queen Mothers. 

At that moment, the door to Tenel Ka's quarters opened, and her grandmother, T'a Chume, entered. Although well past her prime, the former queen was still very beautiful behind the veil she insisted on wearing. Even though it was tradition for the Queen of Hapes to be veiled in public, Tenenial had scoffed at the idea and insisted on remaining unveiled no mater what company she was in. Tenel Ka, taking her cue from her mother, had always refused to wear a veil as well. It was one of the many issues she and her grandmother had fought about over the years. 

"Ah, granddaughter." T'a Chume said as she glided smoothly over to where Tenel Ka sat. It amused Tenel Ka that T'a Chume still avoided calling her by her name whenever possible. The former queen believed such a blatantly Dathomiran name was unsuitable for a Hapan princess.

"I was so grateful to hear that you had arrived."

"Yes grandmother." Tenel Ka said sarcastically. "I'm sure your relief at seeing me and your grief over my mother's death are both overwhelming."

"Now my dear," T'a Chume said, as if addressing an unruly child "your mother and I may have had our differences, but I never wanted her to die." Tenel Ka gave an unladylike snort. 

"You'll forgive me if I find that doubtful." She said coldly. "I don't suppose you've found out who was responsible for my mother's death?" 

"The security cameras were turned off.." T'a Chume began, but Tenel Ka interrupted her. 

"Yes I know." She said. "Don't tell me that even with all of your intelligence resources, you still can't manage to locate your daughter-in-law's murderer?"

"If you would let me finish," T'a Chume hissed, "The security cameras were turned off, and therefore we are unable to identify the killer. However we have reason to believe he is a member of an organization which goes by the name of 'League for the Equality of Sexes in the Hapes Cluster,' or the LESHC movement." 

"And why do you think that?" Tenel Ka asked, although she had no idea who or what the LESHC movement was.

"Perhaps you should learn a little bit about the movement first." T'a Chume answered, in a condescending tone. "Captain Phazir," She said, turning to Aliona, "Please inform my granddaughter as to the true nature of the LESHC movement."

"Yes, T'a Chume." Aliona answered with a bow. Even though Tenel Ka's grandmother was no longer the Queen of Hapes, and had not been for many years, she was still called by the honorary name of the queen, T'a Chume, as Tenenial Djo had chosen not to don the title.

With an insincere smile and a slight inclination of the head to Tenel Ka, T'a Chume swept out of the room, taking half of the guards and attendants and courtiers with her, much to Tenel Ka's delight. After she had left, Aliona approached the chair where Tenel Ka sat, and cleared her throat. 

"Your highness," she said in her calm, cold voice, "do you wish to be told of the LESHC movement at this moment, or would you rather spend some time with your family first?" Tenel Ka looked up at her gratefully. She had expected the woman to simply start rattling off names and dates without a second thought. That she should take Tenel Ka's wishes into account showed her to be compassionate as well as strong. 

"It you don't mind," Tenel Ka said, "I would like to spend some time with my father." Aliona nodded, bowed, and left the room, taking the rest of the guards and attendants with her. 

For the first time since she had entered the room right after her arrival at the palace, Tenel Ka got up out of the chair. If felt strange to be home; she had only been home once since her arm had been sliced off in that lightsaber accident all those years ago. Beginning to pace around the room, Tenel Ka placed her right hand on the forearm of her mechanical limb, which she had had attached to her arm two years before. She had been reluctant to accept the arm. The realization that if she wanted to survive the Yuuzhan Vong invasion she would need two arms had dealt a severe blow to her pride. But she had gotten over it, with some help from her partner Jovan Drark. 

The thought of Jovan sent a wave of homesickness through Tenel Ka. How odd, she thought, when I am standing in my home this very minute. When she had received the message that her mother had been killed, she had left him on Rodia to come back to Hapes. She knew it was too dangerous try and contact him now. It might give away his position, and there were plenty of Jedi Hunters out there waiting for just such an opportunity to pinpoint the location of a Jedi. She reached out with the force to try and touch his mind, but either because the distance between them was so great, or she was distraught with grief, she was unable to reach him. 

It was strange that she should miss him so, miss the life she led. Always hiding her true identity for fear of being hunted down and handed over to the Vong. Always having to run, to worry, to hide, and to fear. Here in the palace she was safe. Here she was a princess first and foremost, and no one would dare hand her over to the Yuuzhan Vong. Still, part of her felt homesick. 

With a sigh, she headed out of her room and down through the long, dimly lit corridors that led to the chapel in the crypt. When she reached the door, she hesitated before entering. She knew on the other side she would find her beloved father, and the body of her murdered mother. She didn't know which she was more afraid to face. 

Taking a deep breath, she pushed the door open and stepped into the stone chamber. On a raised platform made of the same stone as the room itself lay the body of Tenenial Djo, covered in a scarlet cloth. Kneeling before the platform was Tenel Ka's father, Prince Isolder. He did not turn when the door creaked open, for he knew who it was. Only members of the royal family were allowed to enter the crypt. 

Stepping forward, Tenel Ka drew nearer to her parents until she stood along side the kneeling form of Isolder, and stared into her mother's face. Tenenial's eyes were closed, and her face expressionless as if she simply slept. Tenel Ka moved her hand to the scarlet cloth, and then gasped as her father caught her wrist.

"Don't." He said, his voice hoarse. She took no notice of his plea, pulled her wrist free and removed the scarlet cloth.

Her breath caught in her throat as she looked at her mother's naked body. It was covered in deep gashes, the skin around the wounds discolored and puckered. Tenel Ka clenched her fist and replaced the cloth, not daring to breathe for fear she would begin to sob. She heard the rustle of cloths as her father rose to stand beside her. Slowly, tenderly, he put his arms around her and she leaned her head against his shoulder. 

They sat together in the crypt, their backs pressed against the stone platform on which the body of Tenenial Djo lay. Isolder had his arm around his daughter, and she continued to lean against his shoulder, drawing comfort from his steady strength. It was Tenel Ka who broke the silence some time later.

"What will happen now, father?" She asked. 

"Now you will become the Queen of Hapes." He answered.

"I don't want to be the Queen of Hapes." She said angrily. "I am a warrior of Dathomir. I am a Jedi. I have a duty to my fellow Jedi, a duty to fight with them, to aid them in their struggle against the Yuuzhan Vong, and against those who would hand us over to the Vong. I cannot desert them."

"You cannot desert the people of the Hapes Cluster either, my child." Isolder responded quietly. "You have a duty to them as well." 

"I never asked for it." She said sullenly. "I never asked to be a princess." 

"But you are one." He said. "You cannot change what you are, Tenella. You are my daughter, and a descendent of this house. I know your mother chose to raise you according to the traditions of Dathomir instead of the traditions of Hapes, but that doesn't change the fact that you are the Chume T'a." 

"But I don't know how." Tenel Ka said, turning towards him. "I don't know how to rule. I was never taught to be a princess or a politician, I was taught to be a warrior. Father!" She said, sitting up to face him, "I don't know how to be a Queen!" He looked back at her sadly.

"I know." He said, "I know."

"What am I to do, father?" she asked, feeling panic flicker in her chest. Tenel Ka was strong willed and independent. She was always in control of the situation, always ready to meet a challenge. But for the first time in her life she realized just how unprepared to meet this challenge she really was. What did she know about politics, about being a Queen? She had never really thought about it much. She had decided long ago that she would embrace her Dathomiran heritage, not her Hapan traditions. That she would be a warrior and a Jedi instead. Suddenly, something in her began to rebel. They couldn't force her to become a Queen. What were they going to do, tie her down and stick a pen in her hand and compel her to make executive decisions? The idea was so ludicrous she almost laughed out loud. 

"I am not a Queen, father." She said, standing up, her voice back to normal. "I'm sorry, but I can't become the ruler of Hapes."

"You don't have a choice, Tenel Ka." Her father answered, standing up to face her. "If you don't become the Queen, then who will rule the Hapes Cluster?" 

"I don't know." She said, turning away. "And I don't care. But it won't be me." With that, she turned and walked out of the room. Her father stared after her, thinking.

"You cannot rule the Hapes Cluster, my little one." He said softly to himself. "Therefore I must find someone who can."


	4. Love and Hate

Love and Hate

Chapter 4 – Love and Hate

Tenel Ka paced the hallways of the palace restlessly, sheer boredom threatening to overwhelm her. She had tried using one of the palace's inner courtyards to practice with her lightsaber, but the curious and disapproving stares from those who gathered to watch her began to get under her skin, and in the end made her so uncomfortable that she had to quite. Under normal circumstances, Tenel Ka wouldn't have cared what the people thought, but at the moment she was uncomfortable and edgy. Again and again she tried to tell herself that she had made the right decision, that she was the wrong person to rule the Hapes cluster, and it had been in everyone's best interest that she refuse to take the throne. However deep in her heart, she couldn't shake the feeling that her decision had been cowardly, and based not on a wish to see that someone more qualified become the ruler, but on her own fear.

It was at times like this that Tenel Ka regretted never taking up a hobby. She could certainly use a distraction, but the only thing she could think of was doing calisthenics, and she had already spent so much time running around the perimeter of the palace that she knew if she saw those same walls and gardens one more time she would go insane. Remembering the distractions that had so intrigued her friends at the Jedi Academy, she spent a half an hour in the royal menagerie, trying to glean from the many different animals the same sense of peace and tranquillity that she knew it brought her friend Jacen Solo. However, all she got from the experience were dirty fingernails and a couple of bite marks. Given the ease with which Jacen handled his pets, and indeed all animals, it had never really occurred to Tenel Ka that not all little pets were entirely tame. 

Next, she went down to the hanger bay to look at the ships, remembering how therapeutic this pursuit had always been for Jacen's twin sister Jaina. Tenel Ka herself had spent many hours with Jaina and their wookie friend Lowbacca making repairs to Tenel Ka's personal ship, the Rock Dragon, however without her two mechanically inclined friends, Tenel Ka found herself somewhat at a loss, and left the hanger bay in less then ten minutes. 

An hour and a half of pacing later found her sitting in a plush, over-cushioned chair in her personal quarters, staring at the chrono. Neither propriety nor her own sense of duty would allow her to leave the planet and return to her partner until she had attended her mother's funeral, which was still a day and a half away. Tenel Ka found herself counting the seconds, and was just about to start doing some pushups when the door to her chamber opened, and her great grandmother walked in. 

After a moment of staring open mouthed at the age-bent form of Augwynne, Tenel Ka jumped up and bowed deeply. 

"Grandmother," she said, trying to keep the joy and relief out of her voice. "I didn't know you had arrived." 

"Our shuttle docked less then ten minutes ago." The old woman answered. "They offered to notify you, but I thought I would come and speak to you directly instead." With that, she moved forward to embrace her great granddaughter, and Tenel Ka melted eagerly into the witch's arms.

"I didn't expect you to come this early" Tenel Ka said when they had broken apart. The antagonism between her two grandmothers' was intense, and therefore Augwynne preferred to spend as little time on Hapes as possible. That she had come more then a day early was a great surprise to Tenel Ka, who had been witness to the animosity between T'a Chume and Augwynne more then anyone else, as that animosity was usually concerning her.

"I came to make sure that the funeral is carried out according to the traditions of Dathomir." Augwynne answered. Inwardly, Tenel Ka raised her eyebrows, thinking of what T'a Chume would have to say about this. Well, she thought to herself, at least I will no longer be bored.

She was not disappointed. The argument between the two ancient rulers lasted the rest of the morning, and was heated enough to make the security surrounding T'a Chume nervous. Tenel Ka sat passively through it all, as happy to be entertained as she was not to be on the receiving end of either one of the two women's harsh tongues. It was a mark of how much T'a Chume disliked Augwynne that she even argued the point at all. After all, she had never been fond of her daughter in law, and probably wouldn't have cared at all if the body were shoved in a Dumpster somewhere and forgotten. But she was not about to let Augwynne have her way unchallenged, and in the end a compromise was made: Tenenial would be cremated on the traditional Hapan pier, but her body would be adorned in a manner befitting a warrior of Dathomir. 

That settled, the two old women went their separate ways, Augwynne to her guest quarters to meditate, and T'a Chume to her own wing of the palace to seethe. Tenel Ka, once again bereft of distraction, began pacing the palace corridors again. Finally she decided to go back to the hanger bay, not to meddle with the ships, but to watch the mechanics make their repairs and diagnostics. Some of her happiest memories were of the seven of them, her, Jacen, Jaina, Lowbacca, Zekk, Raynar and Lusa, working on the Rock Dragon or the Lightning Rod, Zekk's battered old cargo ship. She had the idea that maybe watching mechanical aficionados would make her feel more at home, even though Jaina and Lowbacca where so far away.

To her surprise, the Dathomiran transport shuttle that had brought Augwynne and her attendants to Hapes was not the only addition to the palace hanger bay since Tenel Ka had last been there. A small, sleek ship sat on a landing pad near the entrance, and it looked distinctly familiar to Tenel Ka, although she couldn't quite place where she had seen it before. A flicker in the force caught her attention, and she turned to see a small figure heading her way, dressed in brown trousers and an off-white tunic. With a smile of recognition, Tenel Ka headed towards the figure, which was a good six inches shorter then she was. 

"Leia!" she said leaning forward to hug the older woman. "I didn't expect you to come." 

"How could I not?" Leia Organa Solo answered as she stepped back to look at Tenel Ka. "Your mother was a great friend of mine, and I mourn her passing with all of my heart." Tenel Ka nodded.

"Thank you." She said. "We are glad you came." Then a thought occurred to her, and her eyes lit up. "Did Jacen come with you?" she asked, looking back towards the ship. 

"No," Leia answered, shaking her head. "He is with his Uncle right now. I haven't seen him in over three months, but I'm sure he sends his condolences, if he is aware of your loss." Tenel Ka nodded, unable to hide her disappointment. She hadn't seen her friend for almost a year now, and she hadn't realized how much she longed for someone to confide in, someone to assure her, as she knew Jacen would, that she had made the right choice in refusing to take the crown. Suddenly a thought occurred to her.

"Leia," she asked, "I would be grateful if I could talk to you for a moment."

Leia nodded slowly as she contemplated what Tenel Ka had told her. Tenel Ka watched her, unable to wipe the look of impatience from her features. She hadn't realized how desperately she needed to be reassured that she had made the right decision. Finally, Leia met the younger woman's gaze, and smiled warmly. 

"I think it is very mature of you to make such a choice." She said, laying a hand on Tenel Ka's shoulder. "Not many people would have the strength to give up a chance to rule a star cluster. That you recognize you are not the best person to take up this burden says a great deal about your character, Tenel Ka." Tenel Ka smiled, relief flooding through her even though deep down inside she wasn't sure she really had made the choice for those reasons. 

Leia patted Tenel Ka's knee. "Now," she said, standing up "I was wondering if I could speak to your father. I haven't seen him for more then three years." 

"I'm sorry," Tenel Ka said, standing up beside the dark hared woman "He is still standing vigil over the body of my mother. His vigil will not end until tomorrow, before the funeral." Leia nodded, looking disappointed but not surprised. Tenel Ka suspected that after so many years of dealing with alien cultures and customs, there was very little that could surprise Leia Organa Solo.

They spent the rest of the afternoon talking in Tenel Ka's chambers. The young Dathomiran girl was eager to hear news of her friends Jacen and Jaina. Although Leia had little to report about Jacen, who she hadn't seen for two months, she had spoken to her daughter Jaina only three days ago, and was more then willing to tell Tenel Ka all she knew of the young pilots comings and goings. Tenel Ka was eager to hear it all, even though it only made her more and more nostalgic for the old days, when they were all young and carefree at the academy, and didn't even know of the existence of the Vong. 

That evening Tenel Ka, Leia, Augwynne, and T'a Chume sat down to eat dinner in one of the smaller dining rooms reserved for more intimate dining with royal guests. Although conversation was still strained between T'a Chume and Augwynne, to Tenel Ka's surprise, her grandmother was nothing but cordial and pleasant to Leia. She had only seen them talk once before, when she had come with Leia to Hapes to entreat the Hapans to aid the New Republic in their struggle against the Yuuzhan Vong over three years ago. She had been too far away to see whether or not their discussion was polite or not, but had assumed, knowing her grandmother's dislike of the New Republic and Leia's family in general, that the conversation had been stiff and full of false smiles and compliments. However, seeing them up close, she saw nothing but genuine interest in her grandmother's face. Leia, for her part, was either enjoying the conversation, or better at acting then Tenel Ka would have thought possible. She had enough respect for Leia and her diplomatic skills not the rule out the possibility that she was simply hiding her dislike very effectively, but she couldn't shake the feeling that Leia was at ease in the company of T'a Chume. Much more so then Tenel Ka. 

As the meal drew to a close, Tenel Ka became more and more uneasy. She was uncomfortable surrounded by the ornate finery of the dinning room, and even the solid and sturdy presence of Augwynne could not alleviate her disquiet. She looked out of place as well, and was startlingly aware of it. Normally she took perverse pleasure in the clash of her lizard hide clothing against the refined opulence of the Hapan palace, but now she just felt out of place and unwanted. She couldn't ignore the fact that Leia, in her simple yet elegant gown of muted gray, seemed perfectly at home in the palace, while she, its rightful heir, could not have seemed more foreign. She chided herself mentally, both for her mild resentment of Leia, and for forgetting that it had been she who had rejected her inheritance, not it her. 

She went to sleep early that night, grateful that the day was over, and that this entire ordeal would be ending soon as well. Even as the thought entered her head, she felt horribly guilty. Since when had her mother's death ceased to be a tragedy and become an inconvenience? Yet no matter how hard she tried, she couldn't summon up the slightest bit of grief. All she could think was that she would soon be gone from the planet, and that now, surely, they would leave her alone and let her pursue her path as a Jedi unhindered. 

She turned over on her back and looked up at the ceiling. The holographicly projected stars and moons stared serenely back at her. She tried to think of her mother, to summon up a memory that might shake the unfeeling cold that had settled over her. But as hard as she tried, she couldn't find one happy memory of her family all together. Even when they were at their vacation home at Reef Fortress Island, there had always been something, some unspoken tension or buried resentment underlying their every interaction. As she gazed up at the stars, her mind turned back to that night a few days after her sixth birthday, when her mother had found the mother of pearl hair clip her father had secretly given her when they were alone. She had been brushing her long red-gold hair in the mirror, and couldn't resist the urge to take the beautifully crafted heirloom out of its wooden box and insert it into her mane of fiery locks. She remembered admiring her reflection in the mirror, thinking how beautiful the swirls of the clip looked against her sunset tresses. Just then her mother had entered the room to wish her goodnight, and had seen the clip shinning in her daughter's hair. Tenel Ka remembered the cold look that had descended across her mother's features when she caught sight of the clip. 

"Where did you get that?" She had asked, pointing her long index finger at Tenel Ka's head. Sensing her mother's anger, and feeling that she had done something wrong, Tenel Ka had cowered back in the small chair. When she didn't answer, Tenenial went forward and took the clip out of Tenel Ka's hair. Tenel Ka had winced as the clip tore out clumps of her hair as it went, but voiced no sound. Tenenial had looked at it for a moment, and then with an angry growl, she had tossed into the garbage bin and stalked out of the room calling Isolder's name. 

Tenel Ka contemplated this memory as she looked at the stars, trying to sort out her own conflicted feelings. She had always loved her mother and wanted more then anything to make her proud, but she began to realize that she had feared the Dathomiran witch as well, feared her wrath and her disappointment. But it was more then fear which soured all of Tenel Ka's memories of her mother. Tenel Ka thought back to her feelings on the night Tenenial threw away the clip, and to her feelings in general about her mother, and realized that she had resented her greatly. She had always felt as if she had to prove something to her mother. And even when she surpassed all of Tenenial's expectations, becoming a Dathomiran warrior and a Jedi knight, she had still felt like she had never really achieved what was demanded of her. 

Angrily, Tenel Ka turned over and shoved her hands underneath her pillow. Looking deep into her heart, she suddenly realized why she had resented her mother all of those years, without even knowing it. Even though Tenenial had spent a great deal of time with her daughter, much more then Leia had ever spent with Jacen and Jaina, Tenel Ka knew, she had never tried to get to know Tenel Ka. She wasn't interested in seeing what kind of person Tenel Ka became, she was only interested in molding Tenel Ka into the person she had wanted her to be. 

Feeling suddenly restless, Tenel Ka got out of bed, rummaged around in her bags until she found her grappling hook, and climbed out the open window. Careful not to loose her balance on the narrow window ledge, she threw the hook up to the top of the palace roof, and with a practiced flick of her wrist, settled it on a stone outcropping. Her bare feet made almost no noise on the cool surface of the stone wall as she deftly climbed the rope. For a moment she reveled in the sensations permeating her body; the ripple of her muscles, the stone of the wall, the brush of a night breeze rustling in her hair. Too soon, the climb was over and she clambered over the stone outcropping on which her hook was securely caught. 

The roof was entirely empty, a desolate expanse of gray stone. With cat-like grace despite her size, she settled herself cross-legged on the roof, her head tilting to gaze at the millions of star scattered across the night sky. She let out a deep sigh, and settled herself into the force to contemplate her feelings. 

She had always known that her growth as an individual had been influenced by her surroundings. But she had believed that the overall outcome of who she was came from her alone, and not her environment. She viewed her choices as her own: her choice to pursue her Dathomiran heritage, her choice to enter the Academy, her choice not to get an artificial limb, and then her choice to get one, were all made without an outside influence. But for the first time in her life, Tenel Ka began to contemplate whether or not her choices had been as wise as she had thought. Given her newest revelation about her mother and herself, could she really be sure her decision to completely refute her Hapan traditions was not due at least in part o her mother's determination to see her do just that? 

And what about her grandmother, T'a Chume. It had been no secret that she wanted Tenel Ka to follow her example, and become a proper Hapan princess. Tenel Ka had always hated her grandmother, but surely she had been mature enough to make her decisions irrelevant of her own bias. Hadn't she? Or was her dislike of Hapan tradition and culture simply a manifestation of her dislike for her grandmother?

The hours slipped by unnoticed as Tenel Ka sat deep in contemplation. The questions she was asking herself shook her to her very core, testing her in a way she had never been tested at any point in her unconventional education. As the sun began to peak out from beneath the horizon, she shook herself out of her reverie and stood up, wincing as her cramped legs unfolded. She dropped carefully down to the ledge of her window, turning once to view the spectacular sunrise before hopping lightly down into her room. After a quick shower, she came out of the refresher with a towel rapped around her, and caught sight of her reflection in the mirror. 

On a sudden whim, she went to the bottom draw of her dresser and removed from under a pile of old socks a small wooden box. She took the box back to the mirror, opened it and took out the mother of pearl hair clip. It seemed to glow in her hand as she gently moved it to catch the light. She felt a sense of wonder bubble into her throat, and for a moment, she almost thought tears were welling in her eyes. In a quick motion, she put the clip back into its box, and began to close the lid. She stopped halfway, and examined her feelings, laughing silently to herself when she realized she had hastened to hide her treasure for fear of being discovered with the stolen present. Hesitantly, she removed her hands, and watched as the lid snapped back open, leaving the clip exposed on the table. She stood looking at it for a moment, and then reached out her other hand to pick up the brush that lay on the other side of the table. With its help, she began to untangle the many braids from her long red hair. 

They ate breakfast in the same dining room where dinner had been served the previous evening. The meal was eaten in silence, as this was the day of Tenenial's funeral. Both Leia and T'a Chume wore black as a sign of mourning, but Tenel Ka and Augwynne were dressed in traditional Dathomiran warrior garb, as they would if attending a funeral on Dathomir. When they were finished eating, they all went to the open garden where the funeral would take place later that day. 

The funeral pier had been all set up, and T'a Chume and Augwynne left together to oversee the preparations for the Procession of Mourning, each eager to find an excuse to start up their argument again. Leia came to stand beside Tenel Ka, and placed a small hand on the taller woman's flowing hair. 

"I don't think I've ever seen you with your hair down." Leia said, smiling warmly. "It looks very becoming." 

"Thank you." Tenel Ka said, not knowing what else to say. She wasn't good at answering compliments. She almost never received sincere ones, now that she and Jacen no longer saw each other on a regular basis. She and Leia stood in silence for a few minutes, but it was not an uncomfortable silence. Finally, Leia turned to leave with a few words about seeing Tenel Ka's father, and patted Tenel Ka on the shoulder before she departed. And then Tenel Ka was alone. 

She turned to survey the garden, deprived of all its trimmings for the big event. Even without the benches and fountains, it was still beautiful, the flowers bright, the grass lustrous, with the blue sky overhead. For the first time since she had arrived on Hapes, Tenel Ka felt a moment of peace, standing there in the garden. She had refused to admit it to herself before, but she loved the environment on the planet of Hapes. Its temperature was just right, the gravity was perfect, and the plants were both wild and tame, a mixture that intrigued Tenel Ka. 

Suddenly she realized that she had never really looked at the planet before. In all the years she had lived there, she had seen only the opulence and the finery of the palace. Even though she had be as surrounded by the peaceful glow of nature as she was by the gaudy flare of riches, for some reason she had never associated Hapes with beauty. Was that because she was blinded by the turmoil in her own family, she wondered? Angrily, she banished the thought and moved to leave the garden. But even as she stepped through the gate, she felt a sense of longing drawing her back, pulling her towards the planet. Her thoughts turned to her imminent departure, and to her surprise, she felt no sense of relief at the idea. 

The funeral was long, somber and thoroughly boring. After her night of self-imposed vigil on the roof, Tenel Ka found it hard to keep from yawning as the procession carrying her mother's shrouded body made it's way from the crypt underneath the palace into the garden with the pier. At the head of the procession strode Isolder, head bent in proper submissive mourning. Tenel Ka and T'a Chume stood on opposite sides of the pier, with Augwynne standing behind it, arms raised and voice keening in a traditional Dathomiran death cry. 

By the time the body finally arrived, carried on a stretcher by four muscular men wearing only loincloths, it had amassed quite a following. As was the tradition on Hapes, all of the funeral guests joined the procession in back of the corps itself instead of waiting beside the resting place as in some cultures. Only direct family members were allowed to precede the body. Tenel Ka could see Leia walking almost directly behind the four men, along with nobles and dignitaries from all of the planets in the Hapan cluster. Behind them came palace servants and guards, and after them came people from towns and cities throughout the planet, there to mourn their leader. Tenel Ka wondered how many of them were actually there out of sorrow for the death of their Queen Mother, and how many were simply there to be polite. Sensing she didn't want to know the answer, she refrained from reaching out through the force to touch the minds of the people there. 

When the stretcher reached the pier, it was placed on top and the four men fanned out, two to each side to stand next to Tenel Ka and T'a Chume. Isolder took his place in front of the pier opposite Augwynne. In ancient times, the consort of the Queen Mother was burned along with her when she died. This was an outdated custom, however, and had been abandoned almost fifty years before the Hapans ever became associated with the New Republic. 

Looking at the body of her mother, Tenel Ka could see that her face was adorned in the traditional Dathomiran fashion, and the shroud she war was made of tanned whuffa hide. Augwynne must have brought it with her from Dathomir. For a moment, there was silence save for Augwynne's eery cry. Then a small child no older then four standard years old came from between the ranks of the observers with a long thin torch, which she gave to Isolder. He took it from her with a small smile, then turned to the crowd and held it up over his head, holding the base with both hands. Augwynne ended her cry, and T'a Chume's voice rang out to break the silence.

"On this day of mourning," her voice rang out, "We bring Tenenial Djo, princess of Dathomir, Queen Mother of Hapes, mother of princess Tenel Ka Chume T'a Djo to the fire. May she watch over us from her place in the Court of the Dead."

With that, Isolder turned to the pier and touched the burning end of the torch to its base. It quickly caught on fire, and the flame spread to the rest of the pier and to the body that lay on top of it. Silently, the crowd began to filter out of the garden, first the watchers, then the servants, and then the nobility and dignitaries, and then even the four guards, until all that was left were the four members of Tenenial's immediate family.

They stood in silence while the body turned to ashes. Tears streamed down Augwynne's face, but try as she might, Tenel Ka could not seem to summon tears of her own. It was not only her customary reserve when it came to displaying emotions. She was genuinely sad that her mother had died, but for some reason she could not seem to feel the overpowering sense of loss that she knew a bereft child ought to feel at the loss of it's mother. She turned her head to look at her father, and was moved by the expression on his face. Like Tenel Ka he was not crying, and his face didn't even show signs of grief. He looked on the body of his dead wife with a soft fondness that penetrated his deep gray eyes. 

Tenel Ka was not naïve enough to think her parents had had a happy marriage. They had married quickly, and more on a whim then on genuine feeling for each other. Tenenial had married Isolder on the rebound from her infatuation with Luke Skywalker, and Isolder had married Tenenial as a way to rebel against his mother. Tenel Ka knew that they hadn't hated each other, but they hadn't loved each other either, and as the years went on even their friendship had begun to fray apart. That he could look at her with such a look of fondness now, after so many years of hardship and so many arguments, spoke so much about her father's character that it brought a lump to Tenel Ka's throat. She felt a sudden burst of love for her father, who had always been there for her and supported her. After her long night of contemplation, she was able to appreciate how great and pure his love for her really was, and how different it was from her mother's love. 

Tenel Ka turned back to look at her mother's body as the last recognizable remnants of it began to dissolve in the orange flames. She thought of all the times Tenenial had pushed her to defy her grandmother, and manipulated her child's mind into thinking one thing or another. She thought of the hair clip, sitting in its open box on her table. She thought of all the other things her mother had taken away from her, in order to shape her into exactly the type of person she wanted her to be. In a way, Tenel Ka thought, she was very much like my grandmother. Maybe that's why they didn't get along. It was a hard idea to stomach, for Tenel Ka had always viewed her grandmother as the personification of everything she had rejected. Coming to the realization that her mother had pushed her in much the same fashion, and had succeeded where her T'a Chume had failed forced Tenel Ka to admit that perhaps the decisions that had shaped her life had not been made for the best. Her thoughts returned to the hair clip, and to the garden in which she stood. Both were purely Hapan, and both, she suddenly realized, were as dear to her heart as her lightsaber. Tenel Ka returned her gray gaze back to the rapidly disappearing body of her mother, and felt a sense of peace wash over her, as she silently addressed the corpse. 

You were not a very good mother, she thought at the body, her gray eyes steady. But you were not a horrible one either. You had your faults, same as every other person. I don't believe I'll miss you. But I don't resent you anymore, either. Perhaps someday, when I figure out who I really want to be, I'll be able to forgive you. For now, rest in peace.

Tenel Ka reached up a hand and ran it through her long red hair. She liked the feel of the smooth hair on her fingers. She liked the way it fell down across her back, silky and shimmering in the sunlight. Perhaps she wouldn't put the braids back in after all. She turned to look at Augwynne, at the woman's traditional Dathomiran dress and manner, and suddenly she felt her sense of peace evaporate. How could she even think that she had made the wrong decision? Dathomir was her heritage, her choice and her love. Suddenly a sense of rebellion overcame Tenel Ka as she looked back at the palace and her grandmother. No, she had not chosen poorly. She had not been merely following her mother's plan for her. She had chosen Dathomir because that was what she wanted. Hadn't she?

When the body was entirely burned, T'a Chume scooped the ashes into a crystal case, and took it into the crypt where it would rest beside the other crystal cases of the past Queen Mothers. Tenel Ka didn't see where Augwynne went. She walked into another one of the gardens, and sat down on a stone bench to watch one of the fountains. She felt the pull of the planet again, touching a place in her soul she had reserved only for the wide plains of Dathomir. After all, Hapan blood flowed through her veins just as surely as Dathomiran. Why should she not feel a connection to the planet? Even as she thought those thoughts, she felt a wave of fear pass over her. Had her entire life been nothing but a mistake? Had all her important decisions been entirely wrong? She felt like a lost little child then, drowning in a lake. What if they were wrong, what would she do then? She was twenty years old, much to old to be 'finding herself' as she believed the term went. Did she really want to reevaluate her entire personality? Could she, even if she wanted to?

Her father came and sat down beside her. He put his hands on her hair, running his fingers through it. "You know," he said, "I haven't seen you with your hair down like this since you were a little girl." She smiled back at him, basking in the warmth of his love. Still smiling, he let his hand fall into his lap, and then heaved a sigh. "You will want to leave this afternoon, I assume?" he asked, looking towards her. 

"Actually," Tenel Ka said softly, "I was thinking about spending some time on Hapes. Spending some time with you, if that's all right." 

"Thinking you might reconsider your decision about taking the throne?" he asked, something she couldn't quite decipher in his voice. 

"No," she said, frowning slightly. "I thought…" for a moment she was uncertain, then she settled on a half truth. "I thought we might spend some time together. After all, I probably won't have a chance to be back here for a while. It would be a pity to leave so soon." That part was true, she did long to spend time with her father. But her wish to make sure she had made the right decisions for her life was even stronger. Surely, if she spent some more time on Hapes, the mysterious longing she felt would turn out to be merely a result of her extreme emotional state. She would go back to her life, all doubts set to rest. Still, she knew herself well enough to know that if she left now, without resolving these issues, she would never be able to fully concentrate on her duty. And a lack of concentration in times like these could get one killed. Absentmindedly, she reached her hand into her mane of hair, and began twisting some strands into a braid. 


End file.
